Listen to a recording of this dictation (subscribers only)

Ascended Master MORE through Kim Michaels, June 8, 2024. This dictation was given at a Deep Healing Retreat Conference in Tallinn, Estonia.

I AM the Ascended Master MORE, and you may say: “What does the First Ray have to do with healing?”

Suppression and denial in the three higher bodies

Well, the First Ray is normally seen as the ray of will, willpower. And in order to be healed, in a universe where free will reigns supreme, you have to have the will to be healed. You have to make a decision to be healed. And this can, for many people, present quite a challenge. Now, as we have already talked about, there are all these mechanisms that can come up. People can take on various roles. You can go into separation and build all kinds of identities there as a separate being. And when you go into separation and duality, you will be in conflict with other people who are in duality. And therefore, you will have unpleasant experiences that will lead to unpleasant feelings and if you cannot find a way to avoid the situation, the feelings can become so intense you cannot live with the feelings, so you suppress them. And then, as we have explained, the energies accumulate, carry over to the physical body, and now you have a physical disease that you cannot suppress, you cannot ignore, as you could ignore the feelings.

You might say that suppression, denial, starts at the identity level. You create a sense of identity that is denying and suppressing something. This is fairly easy to do at the identity level, so it can be easy enough to ignore the need to change your sense of identity. Then at the mental level, it is still fairly easy to create all these beliefs, including belief systems that are based on denial, that you do not have to change, you do not have to look at yourself in order to be saved. You just have to keep believing in Christ. It is still easy to maintain it. And even at the emotional level, you can suppress the feelings. But it is more difficult to suppress feelings than thoughts. For many people, the feelings eventually become so intense they cannot ignore it. But of course, at the physical level, there is, in a sense, it is easy to suppress, because from the time you start suppressing at the three higher bodies, and until this suppressed energy manifests as a physical disease, there is a delay. You can suppress for many years and get away with it. But then as you get older, suddenly a physical disease manifests, and now you have the opposite effect, that once it has broken through in the physical, it also takes longer to overcome it.

The fundamental decision to make

You might say that your four lower bodies, in a way, is a system for helping you come to the point where you stop denying, you stop suppressing, and you say: “I am willing to look at myself, to look at what I can change.” But the difficulty that comes into this is that many people, with the help of the fallen beings of course, have built structures in their individual minds and in the collective mind that prevent you from manifesting that will. Or, if you summon the will, it prevents you from carrying it out. And this ties in with what Mother Mary so magnificently explained about how you can disconnect from your I AM Presence and you can create these structures in your mind, these roles, and it will seem like once you have taken on the role, there are certain things you just cannot do: You are a human being, and there are certain things you cannot do. You have to continue to play the role.

What is this, these roles that people have defined on earth? Many of these roles have been defined by the fallen beings who had the deliberate intent to prevent you from manifesting the willpower to change. What are these roles? In a sense, an excuse for not taking responsibility for yourself, and not making the fundamental decision that you need to make on earth. What is that decision or rather, many decisions? What is it you are here to decide? What did Mother Mary explain? You are here to decide: “What kind of being do I want to be?” You have self-awareness, you have free will. Your basic decision is: “What kind of a being do I want to be?”

Roles with a Catch-22

Now, it is very understandable that when you first start out, or rather I should say when we first start out, because I have of course faced the same dilemma, we are not ready to decide with total freedom what we want to be and do not want to be. Because we start with a very localized sense of self, and we just cannot handle total freedom to decide what kind of beings we want to be. That is why we are put in a predefined, structured environment where there are certain predefined roles that we can take on for a while. We can try them out, we can have this experience, we can say: “Yeah, maybe I have had enough of this, I want to step out of it.” But these roles that are defined on a natural planet, they are not the kind of roles I am talking about that you find on earth, because they do not form that catch-22. Because on a natural planet you can play a certain role and then you can say: “I have had enough of it.” But there is nothing in the role that prevents you from then stepping out of that role and perhaps stepping into another one. But on earth, many roles have been defined by the fallen beings based on the duality consciousness. And they do create, or they are based on, this catch-22. Once you are in the role, it seems like you cannot leave it.

And how have they achieved this? By first creating all of this conflict by deliberately attacking people, by deliberately putting people down so it seems like you are damned if you do, you are damned if you don’t. Because it seems like whatever choices you make, you are going to be wrong, so many people have gone into thinking it is safer not to make choices. The fallen ones, as the second level of their attack, have created all of these roles that make it seem like there are certain choices you just cannot make because you are a human being, you are a woman, you are a Muslim, you are a Russian, you are an American. All of these roles, many more than I mentioned here of course, some not very specific, but they all have one purpose: to give people an excuse for not making a decision to change. And first of all, to give people an excuse for not leaving the role behind. You can go over Mother Mary’s dictation again with the perspective I am giving you, and you will see that what she was trying to take you to was this realization that whatever role you have taken on that you are in now, you can leave it behind at any time.

The role as an excuse

But how do you leave it behind? Well, you have to make the choice. But so many of these roles project at you that you cannot make that choice. You are not allowed to make that choice. You are not supposed to make that choice. It is not spiritual to make that choice. And what does it do? Well, for many avatars who came to earth with the best of intentions, myself included, we were attacked, put down, hammered down, as Nada said, by the fallen beings, to where we felt like: “We better not make any choices because they always turn out to be wrong.” The roles give us an excuse for not manifesting the willpower: “Oh, I’m a fundamentalist Christian. I just have to declare Jesus to be my Lord and Savior, and I’m guaranteed to go to heaven. I don’t have to make any other choice but that.” “Oh, I’m an ascended master student. I just have to do three hours of violet flame a day, and I’m guaranteed to make my ascension after this lifetime. I don’t have to make any other choice than that. And first of all, I don’t have to make the choice to look at what is happening in my own subconscious mind, to look at the beam in my own eye. I don’t have to do this.” Or even: “I’m an ascended master student, and I’m here to help manifest Saint Germain’s Golden Age. I don’t really have to tune into my Presence and see if my Presence is ready to ascend, and therefore, I would have to muster the will to ascend. But I don’t have to do that because I can postpone it. Maybe sometime in the future, but not now.”

The choice to be healed

Again, you have free will. I am not trying to influence your choices here. I am not trying to tell you what to choose, but I am telling you one thing. If you want to be healed of any condition, physical, psychological, you must come to a point where you make a choice to be healed because it will not happen automatically, no matter what system of healing you adopt. No matter what you let someone talk you into believing it will not happen without a decision. And only you, the Conscious You, can make that decision.

All of you have these subconscious selves that are projecting at you, excuses for not making these life-changing decisions. I have no problem whatsoever with a Conscious You making any decision you make that is conscious. But when the Conscious You allows a subconscious self to give you an excuse for not making the decision, then I, as the Chohan of the First Ray must say: “Stop! And think! Become conscious!” Is this really what you want? Do you want to continue having this condition, be it physical or psychological? Do you actually want to be healed? Or do you want to continue having a condition that serves as an excuse for not making the choices of what kind of being you want to be, even here on earth? “Do I want to be an ill being, a crippled being, or do I want to be whole and healed?” I know, as Raphael explained at the very beginning, there are certain conditions that cannot be healed. But I also know there are many conditions that can be healed, many more than what most people can accept with the outer mind. But it is the subconscious selves that prevent you from accepting that healing is possible.

And therefore, what is my task, as the Chohan of the First Ray, is to shake you a little bit so that you make the first decision. Will you stop hoping for some miracle from outside yourself so you will be healed? Or will you make the decision that you, the Conscious You, are willing to become conscious, conscious of whatever subconscious selves you have that caused your condition, physical or psychological, to be manifest? And then make the decision, do you want to continue to have this subconscious self? Are you willing to look at it and decide: “I want to be more than this”?

We are the ascended masters. We know that so many people on earth, whenever we say the word healing, they automatically associate it with miracle. Some outer miracle is going to come in and heal you. But it was not some outer force that caused your condition. It was your inner reaction. It may have been forced by outer condition, but it was still your inner reaction. And therefore, you chose to create those selves and to accept those limitations and to suppress your feelings and to accept certain beliefs and even a certain sense of identity. You chose it.

No ascended master can override your free will. No ascended master wants to override your free will. I do not want to override your free will. I just want your will to be free. And for that to happen, you must start by becoming conscious, looking, you must make the decision you are willing to look and you are willing to see these selves that limit you and you are willing to decide: “I don’t want to be that kind of being anymore. I want to be more than this.” Then we can help you. And we will. But we will not manifest the miracle. But what have we said? Wholeness is your natural condition. You pulled yourself away from wholeness. And a way to get back to wholeness is not to pull yourself or push yourself back, but to stop pulling away, resolving the selves that pull you away. And then you will naturally return. What did Mother Mary demonstrate with the exercise? You have the Conscious You that has a natural tendency to rise towards the Presence. When the Conscious You stops allowing the outer mind, the subconscious self, to pull you away from the Presence, you naturally rise back towards the Presence. You just have to resolve what pulls you away.

Idolatry as an excuse

Now, when you are a new being in embodiment on a planet like earth, you may have, at the level of the Conscious You, even at the level of the I AM Presence, a desire to have certain experiences or to do certain things that you can do on earth. And therefore, at that stage you have this desire, even at the level of the Conscious You, to pull away from the Presence, to go into these experiences, to pull away from wholeness. But when you come to the point where you are a spiritual being, you have transcended that. Or have you? Do you still have some selves you are dragging along with you that are pulling you away from wholeness? Well, of course you do, otherwise you would be in wholeness already and I would not need to stand here and talk to you. You all do, we all did, but what one has done all can do.

And I can tell you that despite the idolatry directed at me from a previous ascended master dispensation, I do not have an over-inflated sense of self. I look back at my many lifetimes on earth and I see that if there is a mistake that could be made, well I made it. The fact that I have ascended should not be a source of idolatry as it was in a previous dispensation. You should instead be saying: “Well, if this guy could do it, so can I.” That is what I want you to think. I do not want you to think El Morya was so special because he had this embodiment or that embodiment. But I also have certain embodiments where I did some really, really crazy things. Do you think that, as Akbar the Great, I saw it as my role to conquer my enemies, and when we had had a battle I had the heads chopped off the enemies and the heads were stacked in pyramids at the entrance to the conquered city? Do you not think that was a crazy stunt, to use a modern expression? Most of you have not done anything like that. Get rid of this idolatry. Look at this self and say: “Why do I have a self that idolizes the ascended masters? Oh, could it be that the more special the master is, the more I have an excuse for not following his example, for not making the decision that El Morya Master MORE made? No, El Morya was so special, he could make that decision. But poor little old me, I just cannot do it. I am not special enough.”

The rest of this dictation, along with an invocation based on the dictation, is found in the book: Deep Spiritual Healing

Back to Deep Healing Retreat