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Ascended Master Guru Ma, June 16, 2013, through Kim Michaels. Given at a conference in Novosibirsk, Russia.

I AM the Ascended Master Guru Ma, with Lanello. Thank you, our beloved hearts, for the outpouring of love. We then would outpour our joy, our joy of seeing that our teachings have been taken by people and used in ways that we could not always imagine while we were still in embodiment. We were so focused on bringing forth the teaching, doing the best we could see, and then not always being as open as we might have been to just letting the teaching go and let people do with it whatever they saw fit in their hearts.

I speak specifically for myself who faced an especially difficult task of suddenly being left alone with four children and a growing spiritual organization to run. After Mark left, there was such a hole in my life that I felt like I was adrift on a raging sea. In order to again get some kind of continuity in my life, I had to have some sense of being in control of life. This caused me to revert to some old momentums from past lives where I had been in leadership positions and thus had the power to institute certain elements of control.

Passing the test of Pisces

I created an organization that was perhaps more structured, more controlled, than it could have been. As I have said before, even that was still an expression, not only of my consciousness but the consciousness of the people who were meant to be given certain tests through that organization. There were many people who came and had expectations of how a spiritual organization, an ascended master organization, should function and should be run. It was the last organization to be sponsored in the Age of Pisces, and in Pisces what did people see? They saw these organizations – like the Eastern Orthodox and the Catholic Church and other religious organizations, such as Islam – that were very centralized and controlled, had many rules, doctrines and dogmas. What was the effect of it? It was that you did not really need to think, that you did not really need to go into your heart and feel from your Christ self what was the right thing to do in your personal life. You just blindly followed all of the rules.

We also had as the goal, both the ascended masters and Mark and I, to provide a record of the Path of Christhood and teachings about the Path of Christhood. The Path of Christhood is a path where you do not follow worldly rules, you do not even follow outer rules; you follow what you directly receive from within.

In the beginning stages of Christhood, you will sometimes make wrong decisions. You will even sometimes get incomplete or incorrect directions from within or you will interpret them through that filter of the lower mind. You can even, if you take an honest look at my life, see that I sometimes colored or interpreted the directions of El Morya in a certain way.

What else can one do? One will not attain Christhood, one will not qualify for the ascension, by following outer rules. We all have to be willing to go through a stage where we strive for a higher direction, a higher vision, but we are still willing to make decisions based on the limited vision we have now. Even if we make a so-called wrong decision, it can still become a step – when we honestly look at ourselves – for internalizing a greater degree of Christhood.

Being willing to look at your decisions

There comes a point where you must be willing to look at your decisions, look at your so-called mistakes. You must honestly acknowledge the decisions and their consequences, but when it comes to acknowledging them as mistakes, you actually need to step up to a higher level. You need to recognize that they were only mistakes when seen through a certain consciousness, and that consciousness is not the consciousness of Christ. It is an element of the human consciousness that you have elevated to the status of superiority, of being absolute, of being true in some higher way.

You have taken a lower consciousness, an expression of the consciousness of anti-christ, and you have put it in the place where the consciousness of Christ should be. It is, as the Bible says: “The abomination of desolation standing in the holy place where it ought not.” You are judging yourself and others through that element of the consciousness of anti-christ. The very consciousness that causes you to make a certain choice is also the consciousness through which you will judge the outcome of that choice.

Do you see that if you look at an action and label it as a mistake through the same element of anti-christ that caused you to take that action, then you will not be free from the action? You will only pour more energy into it through your feelings of guilt or self-condemnation. You reinforce the spiral rather than transcending it, and that it why it is so important to consider that element of Jesus’ teachings, mission, example and ministry which is that Christ can forgive all, that Christ can redeem all sins.

NOTE: The rest of this dictation is available in the book: Don’t Drink Your Own Kool-Aid.