Feeling special will not take you to Christhood


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Ascended Master Maitreya through Kim Michaels, December 6, 2020. This dictation was given during the 2020 Webinar – Increasing your Christ Discernment.

I AM the Ascended Master Maitreya. In this discourse I wish to discuss a topic that may seem like an enigma, perhaps even a contradiction to some people. Nevertheless, when you reach the higher levels of Christ discernment, you need to begin to deal with many such enigmas. They are all created because of the duality consciousness and the linear mind, even sometimes the deceptions of the fallen beings. As you grow in Christ discernment, you need to begin to contemplate such things and resolve them by going beyond the linear mind, by going beyond the dualistic mind. They cannot be solved from the linear mind, only by transcending it.

Now, let us go back to the fourth sphere when no being in this world of form had fallen. What is the situation of a new co-creator that has been sent into an unascended sphere? We have said that you start out with a point like sense of identity, then you are meant to expand that sense of identity from there. In a sense you could say that as you expand your sense of identity, your sphere of awareness, what happens to you? Well, you become more and more capable of co-creating. You can envision something, and then you can manifest it. You can become very good at manifesting some elaborate structures.

This means, that when you look at a sphere that is starting to grow from its starting point and you look at the co-creators in that sphere, you will see that over time there is a certain differentiation that begins to appear among co-creators. Some, expand their sense of awareness more than others, some become more capable of co-creating than others. This means that there will be some who from a certain perspective are ahead of others. They can then serve as examples. Of course, you are talking about an unascended sphere. In the first three spheres, those who were ahead of others became examples, became teachers, became those who helped others. As we have explained, each sphere, each new sphere that was created was slightly denser than the previous one. So, when it came to the fourth sphere, the sphere reached such a level of density that among the billions and billions of co-creators in that sphere, there were a few who could not make the transition to become teachers and those who helped others.

Instead, they began to set themselves up as leaders, they believed that instead of helping those below them grow, they should direct and even control those below them, so that those below them would follow the leader. What does this essentially mean? Well, it means that when you become an example and a teacher, you are using your own attainment to help others grow in attainment, to help others expand their awareness. But when you become a leader, what happens? You are now using your own attainment to limit the attainment of others, so that they remain at the level where they are willing to follow and obey you.

Now again, free will is allowed to outplay itself. So by the time the fourth sphere had reached the ascension point, there were a few planets in that sphere among billions of planets, where one being had set itself up as the undisputed and unquestioned leader, with billions of others being the followers of that leader, seeing themselves as the followers of the leader, being satisfied with being the followers instead of taking responsibility for themselves. This is another thing that happens as the spheres got denser.

In the fourth sphere, there was for the first time some beings that felt it was too overwhelming to expand their awareness beyond a certain point, so they stopped. They became satisfied with staying at that point, and they were (so to speak) looking for an excuse for not taking full responsibility for their growth. They found that excuse by following what they considered a superior leader. This was a process that took a very long time. It is not so that there was one planet where one person raised himself up as the leader, and all of the other billions of lifestreams on that planet followed the leader. There was a gradual process over time, where on some planets a few people did not want to take responsibility for themselves, so as the planet was raised, they could no longer embody on that planet. But then they went to embody on one of these planets where one being had set itself up as the leader. So, you see this gradual process – where those who did not want to take responsibility for themselves were concentrated on that small number of planets, where you had one being that had set itself up as the undisputed leader.

What is it that, in a sense happens on such a planet where you have this dynamic? Well, let us first look at the leader. The leader in its own mind builds this sense that it is very special. It is very special compared to all other people on the planet. It thinks this applies to all other beings in the universe. So, it builds this self that has this need to feel special. Now, this is not, at least in the beginning, done out of any evil intent. As we have said, you have a built in drive to become more, to expand your sense of self. There are some that are more eager to do this than others, they apply themselves in a more concentrated way and therefore achieve a certain progress.

There came as I said a turning point, where you must choose between either becoming an example and a teacher for others, or becoming the leader who seeks to actually hold others back. When you make that switch to become the leader, it is because you have built this sense of wanting to be not only special, but be unique, be more special than anyone else. There is a rather complex psychology behind this that is too much to go into here. Nevertheless, the leader has this very, very strong desire to be special. Now, the followers even though they become followers of a leader, they still have a desire to expand themselves. So, they also have a desire to feel that they are doing something special. In a sense, these people subconsciously know that they are not fulfilling their highest potential. It puts them in a state of being sort of dissatisfied, feeling behind. They compensate for this, by following the leader and building the sense that they are special because they are following this leader.

Now, on some of these planets this happened because there was a period where there was more than one leader on the planet, so there was a competition between two leaders. Eventually, one of the leaders was no longer embodying on the planet and there ended up being only one leader. The people had, by switching from one to the other, built this sense of being special because they followed this particular leader. So, you now have this dynamic that appears between the leader and the followers, where the followers, are in a sense having the most difficult situation because they have a drive to become more, they do not fulfill it, they know they are not fulfilling it. So, how do they compensate for this? Well, they as I said, compensate by feeling that they are special because they follow their leader. But what does that mean? It means that for them, the leader needs to be very special. The more special the leader is, the more special the followers feel, the more they can cover over their inner knowing that they are not fulfilling their highest potential because they are just following the leader.

Now, at the same time of course, the leader also builds this desire to be special and it is reinforced by all the followers. So, you enter this spiral that I described yesterday of wanting to be more and more, having a higher and higher position, even coming to the point where you want to be God. This is then what happens when the sphere is ready to ascend, and now this leader is confronted with the ascended masters. He has been used to for a long time of being the highest authority on his planet. I say ‘he’ because they were all in a male body when this happened. So, he was used to being the highest authority, now he is confronted with the ascended masters and he realizes, he experiences directly in an undeniable way that the ascended masters are beyond him, they have a higher authority than he does, they have greater powers than he does. So, he looks into that abyss of feeling that he could lose his specialness and fall all the way down, and have to start over being nobody.

This, is essentially what you have to do in order to start the upward path. You have to be willing to be humble and recognize that there is something I have not learned, something I have not mastered, there is perhaps even something I have misunderstood, misinterpreted. I have built this false sense of who I am, and you have to be willing to question that and therefore go down and look at “what was the point where I took this turn that brought me into this dead end?” It feels to these leaders like a great humiliation. If they are not willing to go through it, then they go into this state of mind that now they ignore and deny the existence of ascended masters. They ignore and deny the existence of a higher authority that has greater powers than they do. They switch into creating their own worldview, where they twist everything around, they interpret everything in such a way (and  of course this is where the duality consciousness plays in) that they are the ultimate authority, they are the God who knows good and evil. They then make this claim to those that are their followers on this planet, and because of free will they are allowed to make this claim.

Now, these followers on the planet are also confronted with the reality of the ascended masters, but their leader is allowed to express his new worldview to them. The followers then have this choice to make between the ascended masters, and the leader who claims to be a higher authority than the ascended masters. When the leader falls, well – some of the followers usually fall with the leader. So, we now have this group of people who fall into the next sphere and have created this strong bond between them. This means that, not necessarily right away will they be on the same planet, but over time they will tend to gravitate towards the same planet again. If the leader does not turn around and start the upward path, the leader will continue to reinforce this sense that he is so special, and in the next sphere he will gradually gravitate to one of these planets that are not making as much progress as others. Over time, the followers will also graduate to this planet.

This is what you can see outpictured on earth, where you have seen these leaders of history that attract to them a certain group of followers who absolutely will not question the leader, will blindly obey the leaders commands being firmly convinced that his will, regardless of the evidence to the contrary, lead to some specified result. This means that on a planet like earth, there is this very, very strong collective entity that is based on this desire to feel special. You see this outplayed in many different ways in history. You see the Egyptian civilization, where some of the pharaohs claimed to be God on earth, God in embodiment, and had a certain group of followers that believed this claim. You have seen other civilizations throughout the world with similar beliefs. You saw the Roman civilization, where some of the Emperors also started claiming they were God in embodiment, they were God on earth and some people believed this.

You saw the Jews who, a very long time ago, had this need to feel that they were special more than other people. Instead of following an outer leader, they came up with the idea that there was a superior God and they were the chosen people of this God. So, you see this very old momentum on earth and this very powerful collective entity that wants people to feel special. You can see even in modern times how the Germans in the early 1900s had a need to feel special, the French had a need to feel special, the British had a need to feel special and the clash of these three groups of people ignited the First World War and set the stage for the second. Again, you saw how Hitler built up the German sense that they were special and in a category by themselves and this then launched the Second World War. You saw during the Cold War, how the Soviet Union was fueled by this drive to be special. The American nation was also driven by this desire to be the greatest nation on earth, that was why there was this rivalry between them.

You can look at this as the outplaying of Capitalism versus Communism. You can also step back and see that it was just simply two groups of people that were driven by this desire to feel special, and they were competing about who could outsmart the other, win the Cold War and become the most special. You of course, you know what the outcome was and you know who ended up feeling like they were the most special because of it.

What this leads to, is that there comes a level of Christ discernment where you need to begin to see this, you need to begin to see that there is this very old momentum of people wanting to feel special on earth. There are by the way, many other planets, natural planets where you do not have this phenomenon, but on earth you do have it. You also need to recognize that there are some very strong collective beasts, there are some fallen beings in embodiment who have this insatiable desire to feel special, to be the ultimate authority.

Of course, as a Christed being you need to be able to see beyond this, you need to be able to see that the fallen beings have been very clever at creating various ideas and belief systems. But even beyond clearly defined ideas and belief systems, the fallen beings have created this (we might say) a general consciousness that does not have a physical anchor point in a specific ideology or theory, but is as we have said before, floating around in the collective consciousness, floating around in the emotional realm, in the mental realm and in the identity realm. This consciousness drives people to be special.

This is where you need to recognize here, that when you are an avatar in embodiment on a planet like earth, this presents you with an enigma. Because again, you go to this sphere which is the densest yet, you look at even a natural planet and there is a certain density even on a natural planet. Even on a natural planet we might say there is a certain segmentation of the population. Some of the avatars, or the co-creators on a natural planet are more eager to expand their awareness than others − they build a certain sense of accomplishment. It is not necessarily the same sense of being special as you see on earth, because it is not what the fallen beings have built. But there are still avatars who set goals for themselves, and fulfill or exceed those goals. They can see realistically that they are ahead of others, they have expanded their sense of self, their co-creative abilities, their knowledge. There often comes a point where these avatars that are more advanced than others, they begin to then serve in a public capacity. There are many opportunities on a natural planet to go into some form of public service where you are helping society grow and raise it up.

But there are some avatars who come to a point where they feel that because they have been so eager, they have (so to speak) explored all of the possibilities for growth and self-transcendence that are offered on their planet, they have a desire to experience a new environment. This means they may go to another natural planet and for a time explore the possibilities there. There again, the most eager co-creators will come to a point where they feel they have explored everything that can be done on a natural planet and now they are looking for some other experience, this is when some of them become aware of unnatural planets, as a result of “you” so to speak, being the forerunners, I am deliberately not saying the elite, but the forerunners – you form this desire to take embodiment on an unnatural planet, to also have that experience. You realize that many avatars have come to earth with a great co-creative achievement from natural planets. You come here, you have far greater awareness and co-creative ability and momentum than the average person on earth.

Now, as we have said you do not descend with the fullness of that momentum, you descend at the 48th level of consciousness and have to work your way up. Nevertheless, you still have this momentum of being willing to apply yourself, to look at yourself − how could you do better? It does not take you that long to learn how things work on earth, then start excelling compared to even those who have been on earth for a long time but have not taken full responsibility for themselves. You see this is how avatars become seen as a threat by the fallen beings, because all of a sudden you have these people who are embodying on earth, and who actually have the ability to become examples and teachers, this is of course the purpose for which you descended to earth.

But the fallen beings will see this as a threat, and that is why they expose you to the birth trauma and seek to destroy you. Now, as I said yesterday some avatars have the idea before they come to earth, that they want to create certain physical changes here, they want to remove certain kinds of suffering. This also becomes a threat to the fallen beings, because what is the cause of the suffering? Well, it is  that the fallen beings have formed an elite on earth that suppresses the broader population, causes them to live in poverty, conflict, and all of these things. So, even from the very beginning you might have this idea as an avatar, that you have to somehow neutralize the fallen beings as leaders and set yourself up as a leader, so you can help the people out of their suffering.

You see that you can even come to the planet with a certain idea that you need to oppose the fallen beings. This can be another reason why they expose you to the birth trauma in order to destroy you, so you see this dynamic going on. That is why you see, that as avatars climb from the 48th level of consciousness to higher levels of consciousness, they can take their inner sense of their attainment from a natural planet and it can then color this. They become colored by the consciousness of the planet with this momentum or desire to feel special that you have had on earth for a long time. Some avatars can actually become colored by, they take on these collective beasts of wanting to be special. You can even as an avatar, build this sense that in order to help people, you need the people to follow you instead of the fallen beings. How do you get people to follow you? You have to be special − you have to seem special. This is why there are many spiritual people, even many ascended master students, who dream of one day having these special abilities where they can manifest these almost miraculous things. They can, so to speak, present something to the people that the people cannot deny and now the people will follow them and therefore, they will be able to achieve the goals they have set for themselves. You can see how an avatar can on earth, build this desire to be special, as this is defined on earth.

Take note of what I am saying, the fallen beings have for a long time on earth been building this momentum of the desire to be special, they have defined what it means to be special, they have defined the parameters on earth for what it means to be special on earth and many of the people on earth have bought into this. Some of the people on earth have followed these fallen beings for a long time, but that does not apply to the original inhabitants who did not follow the fallen beings. Still, they have been overpowered by this, believing that this is what it requires to be a special leader. That is why you saw the German people follow Hitler, whom they believed had special abilities, you can see the same with many other leaders.

What avatars can be trapped in, is this desire to make themselves special according to the standard defined on earth. So, now you find a spiritual teaching, a spiritual path, perhaps an ascended master teaching and you are seeking to use that teaching to build the sense that you are special, this is just the dynamics on earth. I started out talking about enigmas that need to be resolved, this is where this desire to be special can form an enigma for ascended master students and many other spiritual people. At one level, we have said that as you are walking from the 48th level towards the 96th level, one of the primary tasks that you are dealing with, is you have to pull yourself above the pull of the collective consciousness. In other words, you do not become the living Christ on earth by following the crowd, by following the collective consciousness.

In order to put on individual Christhood, you need to be an individual who is seeing yourself as separate from the mass consciousness. You are pulling yourself step by step above the mass consciousness. This is what you need to do, because you cannot manifest Christhood if you are flowing with the currents of the mass consciousness. You need to flow with the currents coming from your I AM Presence in order to manifest Christhood. That is why you also saw Jesus being different from the average person of his time, this is part of building Christhood.

The enigma comes in because, as you are pulling yourself up, as you are following a teaching that most people cannot grasp and understand, this can become colored by the planetary momentum of the desire to feel special. In other words, you can say that there are two parallel tracks that are going on in the minds of many people. In a way, we can say that pulling yourself above the levels of the mass consciousness is in a sense, a neutral endeavor. You might say that, if you take a person who is training to participate in the Olympics as a runner, you can say that this person starts out having a certain running speed. He can run the 800 meters in a certain number of seconds. He now goes into an intensive training program. He gradually increases his body’s ability to run faster, he builds up his muscles, he builds up his ability to take in oxygen and he expands his body’s ability to run faster − the body, the physical body can perform better. And now he can suddenly run 800 meters in less seconds than when he started. This is in a sense, a neutral − we might even say, a mechanical process. But of course, what you see in many of these athletes is that they are not simply neutral in their desire to sacrifice a lot of time and attention in order to win an Olympic medal. They have a value judgment associated with this because they feel it is valuable to win a medal and it will make them special. This is what drives them. But it really has nothing to do with the building up of the body’s ability to run faster. I know there are certain psychological components, where you also have to build up your psyche to become faster, but nevertheless you get my point.

Raising yourself above the collective consciousness is a neutral endeavor. It is not mechanical, but it certainly is just a process whereby you raise your level of consciousness so that you are not pulled down by the collective. But when this endeavor is colored by this planetary momentum of wanting to be special, and even the momentum you had from a natural planet of feeling that you were the forerunners, then it often leads spiritual people to build the sense that they are special because they are in this spiritual teaching, following this particular guru, they understand this advanced teaching and they experience – raise their level of consciousness beyond where they started.

You can look at religious movements, spiritual movements throughout the planet, New Age movements, Ascended Master organizations, previous dispensations that we have sponsored, and you can see that many, many of them, they have a certain organizational culture that makes the members feel special. There is a large portion of the members who have built this sense of being special because they are in this organization. In a previous ascended master organization they firmly believed they had the highest teaching on the planet, and therefore they were the most advanced spiritual people on the planet. What they didn’t realize and acknowledge was that you could find 100 other spiritual movements that had the exact same belief − that they were the ones who were special because of their teaching.

The question now is, what does this have to do with Christ discernment?  Very simple. As long as your mind has this desire to be special, it will color the way you look at yourself and your progress on the path, it will color the way you look at your relationship to other people. You simply cannot go beyond a certain level of Christ discernment as long as you have this desire to be special. Because as we have said before, you can rise from the 48th to the 96th level of consciousness without having confronted certain aspects of the ego, certain separate selves. But, at the 96th level there is a glass ceiling, and you cannot go beyond that glass ceiling until you have confronted the desire to focus on yourself. The desire to walk the spiritual path in order to raise yourself up, in order to make yourself feel special. You simply cannot go beyond it. It is one of the safety mechanisms, just as the fact that you cannot ascend until you have overcome all self-centered tendencies.

You can come to this point of being there at the 96th level, and this is where many ascended master students and people from other spiritual movements have gotten stuck. But as we have said, you cannot really remain stuck for very long, so you must then start a downward spiral, and what does that mean for some people? It means that they go into this spiral of studying harder, practicing harder, doing everything they can do according to their spiritual teaching, doing it more eagerly and thereby they build more and more this sense of being special. If these people would be honest with themselves, they would be able to see that there is also an inner, very subtle sense that it is not enough, that they are falling behind, that something is missing.

This is because you are no longer growing from one level to the next, and you know you are no longer growing. You may be building an outer sense of being special because of all the things you have done. But as we have said before, you cannot force your way into heaven. You cannot buy your way into heaven. You cannot come there to the gate, to the ascended realm and say: “Look at all these things I have done on earth. Look how many decrees I have given. Look how much I have studied. Look how much money I have given.  Look at all of these things I have done. You have got to let me in because of all I have done.” But this is what Jesus said, when he talked about those who have prophesied in his name, who have cast out devils in his name, who have done all all of these things.” He would say: “I know you not,” because they had stopped walking the path to Christhood and instead gone into building the sense that they were so special.

There comes that point at the 96th level, where you need to resolve this enigma. You need to confront this and realize that Christhood is not about making yourself special compared to others. Christhood is not about setting yourself above others, winning some kind of competition with others, or winning a battle with the fallen beings. As we have said before, the enigma is that in order to raise yourself above the mass consciousness from the 48th to the 96th level, you actually have to build a certain sense of self that is stronger than what most people have. That is the only way at that level that you can avoid being swept away by the currents of the mass consciousness. From the 48th to the 96th level, you are building a certain sense of self but that self is not going to take you from the 96th to the 144th level. What is it you have to do to move from the 96th to the 144th? You actually have to deconstruct the self you have built.

In a sense, from the 48th to the 96th level you are building a sense of self, and from the 96th level to the 144th level, you are breaking down that sense of self until you come back to this state where you are the man, the person who descended from heaven, you are back to pure awareness. Everything you have built in order to have experiences on earth, you have dismantled again. That is why you can walk through the gate to the ascended realm, because you cannot take any of these things you have built on earth with you. Whatever structures you have built in your four lower bodies, you cannot take them with you to the ascended realm.

Now, I know very well, that this presents an entirely different enigma. It is something that those who are part of this dispensation are not quite as conscious of as those who are part of previous dispensations. In a sense, you could say that we who are ascended masters have sort of intensified this enigma. We have not exactly created it, but we have certainly intensified it. If you go back, for example, to the Summit Lighthouse, you will see that the ascended masters were presented as beings who had clearly special, even supernatural abilities. There was also much talk in the Summit Lighthouse about our previous embodiment’s, which we do not talk so much about in this dispensation.

You can go back to the Summit Lighthouse and see how they presented certain previous embodiment’s where El Morya had been this famous person in the past, had been this emperor in the past, other masters had been this king, or that scientist, or that philosopher. What was sort of the image that was given here? It was that those who had ascended, had in past lifetimes been very special people with special knowledge, special abilities. The underlying assumption that was found in the culture was that this is how you ascend, you become a more and more special person with special abilities, and this is why you can ascend. In other words, the impression that was created was the opposite of what I just said. The impression that was created was that you build a sense of self that is aside from the collective consciousness, that is special compared to the average person. Instead of starting to dismantle it at the 96th level, you keep building on it, so it becomes more and more special. And when it reaches a critical mass of specialness, then you ascend with that self intact. In other words, the special self that you had built over many embodiments, that is what carries you into the ascended realm. That is what you take with you into the ascended realm.

I fully admit that certain elements of the teachings given both in the Summit Lighthouse and previous movements such as the I AM movement encouraged this view. This is why you will see in these movements, a very strong idolatry towards the messengers and towards the ascended masters. You may say: “Well, why did we allow this to happen?” and the simple explanation is again, the Piscean age, certain initiations needed to be passed in the Piscean age.

One of these initiations, is to overcome this idea that you are building a self that is so special, that God simply has to let it into heaven. This is in a sense, the belief that some fallen beings have had, from the moment they fell. They did not grasp what an ascended master is, they could not grasp it. They thought that the ascended masters are just like you see on earth. There is one country that has an army, and right now that army is stronger than my army, so I cannot beat them. But if I build up my army, there can come a point where I can beat them.

So these fallen beings thought,”Well, the ascended masters are just some beings that right now have greater power than I do. But if I keep building my power, there can come a point where I will have greater power and then I can beat them, beat the ascended masters. I can prove them wrong, I can prove to God that I am the one who should be in charge of the universe instead of the ascended masters.”

This is again, part of this whole desire to be special that the fallen ones have taken with them to this planet, and they have built this momentum. So, it was necessary at the end of the Piscean age that students would be presented with this challenge. There were, if you go back and look at the dictations we gave in the Summit Lighthouse, many, many teachings that could help people transcend this. We also knew, as we have said before, there is a certain number of students who are not willing to listen to this. So what do we need to do? We need to inflate the condition in the hope that they will see it. That is why we had to allow in a certain organization, the inflation of this idolatry of the messengers, idolatry of certain people on staff, and the self-idolatry of people feeling so special because they were in this movement that had the highest teaching on the planet.

But look back to the beginning of Pisces. Jesus, even in the fragmented statements that have survived in the Scriptures, laid out the challenge of Pisces. Which basically is to challenge, to overcome this desire to feel special that the fallen ones have brought. If a critical mass of people could overcome this during Pisces, then certain fallen beings would be taken off the planet. What did he say right there in the beginning? Well, he said: “Only the man who descended from heaven can ascend back to heaven”—very clear. You may build a self here on earth that makes you feel very special, but it means nothing to God, it means nothing to Christ, “I know you not.” “He who would be greatest among you let him be the servant of all.” Well, right there, if you build the sense that you are special and you are the leader, it works against what Jesus defined as the goal for Christhood in the Piscean age.

What all of this leads to, is that there comes this point where you as an ascended master student need to start contemplating this. Because, if you do not solve this enigma in your own mind, and it is individual for each of you how, what you have taken on in past lives, and what beliefs and what separate selves you have that support this. But if you do not resolve this in your own mind, you cannot go above that 96th level. Because at the 96th level is where you stop focusing on self and you focus on how you can serve something greater than yourself. The Omega of it is that you serve other people, the Alpha of it is that you serve the ascended masters and see that we have a certain agenda, such as manifesting the golden age or removing the fallen beings from the planet, or raising the collective consciousness and you devote most of your life and attention to doing this.

Except, of course you can still have certain desires, certain things you want to experience on earth, before you can ascend, this is also part of your path. But you are focused more on serving other people than raising yourself up to feel special. This is a clear shift you need to make. It doesn’t happen all at once, but there needs to be that shift where you stop focusing on self and realize as this messenger adopted the motto many years ago: “It is not about me.”

It is not about you. You have especially in Zen Buddhism, a concept that is quite old of “ego pummeling.” Where there is a realization that everybody has an ego that has certain characteristics, a certain pride, and it needs to be pummeled, it needs to be put down, it needs to be humiliated until it is broken down. This is not necessarily what you have to do as an ascended master student, but you have to gradually free yourself from this focus on self. You have to come to realize that it is necessary to overcome this focus on self. You don’t have to overcome it all at once, but you have to realize that this is the goal.

This is your new goal on the path, to break down the focus on self so that you realize, it is not about you, meaning the outer self. It is about you, the Conscious You returning to the state of pure awareness, instead of being identified with these selves or this sense of self that you have built here on earth. You cannot take it with you: the self you have built on earth, no matter how special it is, how capable it is, and so forth. What have we said, you may have an ascended master who in past lifetimes was a famous person, who had great attainment. But it is not the earthly attainment that caused that master to ascend, it was the heavenly attainment stored in that master’s causal body. That is what you take with you into the ascended realm and that gives you a momentum as an ascended master. But it is not a continuation of the momentum that you had built on earth, even in your most capable embodiments.

So, why did we give these examples of these lifetimes? Well, again it was part of the times, it was part of what Jesus called the “bait and switch” where we have to give people something that appeals to them. We also have to recognize there was a certain Mandala of the students that the organization was created for. We had to give them the initiations they needed. They needed that initiation in order to start walking the path, they needed to have a sense that this can make them special. Then once they were on the path, we then attempted to help them go away from it. Of course, there were quite a number of students who passed that initiation, who stopped being so focused on themselves and who therefore moved on to higher levels of the path. But there were also those who did not and to this day, have not done so.

So what does this lead to? Well, it leads to the fact that there comes a certain point on your path where you need to start making this switch. As I said, it is not an all or nothing. It is not something that happens in one glorious epiphany. But you need to come to the conscious awareness that it is not really about you. It is not about continuing to build this separate sense of self that is so special. In fact, if you again look at the life of Jesus who set the archetypal example at the beginning of Pisces, he did not actually set himself apart as being special compared to others. You will see that he called himself the “Son of Man” in the beginning of his mission, this was because he wanted people to identify with him so they could see him as an example, instead of seeing him as being so special that: “Oh we could not possibly do what Jesus did. So let us just remain followers of Jesus, this so special leader.”

This, of course is what you also need to ponder and come to this recognition: that you are not doing this to earn points on some kind of scale that you think that somebody in heaven is keeping. There is nobody in heaven who is keeping score for you. It is only your ego, that separate self that is keeping score. You use an ascended master teaching to define certain goals. This separate self-defines certain goals and says: “This is what I have to do to earn points. So, this is what I am doing.”

This self is there, it is part of the planetary self, you cannot embody here without taking it on, we have all done it in our lifetimes. You have to deal with it, like we have all dealt with it. That is why we are giving you these teachings to help you pass the initiation, hopefully easier, in an easier way than it was for us. You realize here that, again there is no blame here. You do not need to feel bad about having this tendency. It is part of the path that you have this. It is also part of the path that you rise above it. There is nothing wrong with having a certain momentum. That is why it is so crucial that you come to this point, where you can look into your psychology and you can see a momentum and you do not blame yourself for having it. This is another enigma on the path. It is again created by this desire to be special.

You have if you look at ascended master students and other spiritual people, you have in any movement those who are a little more eager than others. They are more eager to apply themselves, they are more willing to sacrifice, break off their normal lives in order to devote their lives to spiritual progress. But many of these people are partly motivated, or their motivation is colored by this desire to be special. They think that if you are special, you could never really be wrong, you could never do something really bad. So, here comes we, the ascended masters and we face a very simple situation. In order to help you qualify for your ascension, we have to help you break down whatever self you have and return to that state of pure awareness. We have to help you see the unresolved psychology you still have, the selves you still have. But if you have this idea that you need to be so special and therefore you could never be wrong, you will be reluctant to see something in your own psychology. You will think: “Ah Well, the masters are talking about other people who have this tendency, but I do not have it.”

If you are honest with yourselves, you can see that you have all had this reaction. Again, nothing wrong with it. That is just the way it is. But you can come to that point where you get over it. Those who are the most successful students are the ones who get to this point where they say: “But you know what, it is not a matter of hiding anything from the ascended masters. It is not a matter of hiding anything from myself, because I have already looked at a lot of things in myself, and I have already overcome them. So, that means that anything that is still remaining in my psychology is something I can overcome also. I already know that the masters are not condemning me for the things I have already overcome. So why would they condemn me for what I have not yet seen? They just want to help me see it and overcome it and be free of it. So why am I resisting? Why am I reluctant to look at it?” Well, of course, you are reluctant to look at it because you have this sense that you need to be special. You couldn’t be really wrong. People will not listen to you, you cannot fulfill your goals on this planet as the messenger explained last night.

Many of you have slightly different mechanisms, slightly different beliefs than the messenger described, but you have something that causes you to resist seeing things in your psychology. You think that there are certain things I can look at, they are fairly neutral, but there are other things that “I would really condemn myself if I had this tendency. Therefore, I do not want to see it.”Therefore, you have this tendency that you withdraw yourself from us psychologically. You withdraw yourself and you are, without being consciously aware of it, you are essentially saying to us: “Masters, you can expose these things in my psychology but the things in this area, I don’t want you to expose.” That is what you are saying subconsciously, even though you are not aware of this. You can be aware that you have a certain resistance in you, a certain fear that something would be exposed that would be so bad, that would cause you to fail. This is something that is a fear, a fear that comes from the fallen beings, the fear of failure, but this is something I will save for my next discourse, as I have given you what I wanted to give you in this installment.

So with this, I seal you in the great flame of joy that I hold for this planet. I have been called the Great Initiator, and it is a great joy for me to initiate people, but people often have misunderstood what it means to be initiated. This is partly because of this fear of failure. So, this is something I will tell you more about when we return for my next discourse.

 

Copyright © 2020 by Kim Michaels